Dating....

Keith and I look at making friends as a couple kind of like dating ..... we meet another couple, and we enjoy their company. We'd like to be friends. We try the "exploratory first date" --- go out to dinner, a family activity if they have kids, a lunch, or something else fun. Get to know them. One on one, together, all of us as a group. Then Keith and I regroup. Can we date them? Can we be friends? Can I hang with her without Keith?..... Can Keith enjoy him without me?..... Even more important... do we think they like us? Were we funny, or did we just think we were funny? (important question that we never really know the answer to) Could this be a serious relationship, or is it just a superficial one, because our kids are the same age, etc., etc. ... for the sake of the kids?

Not really a "joking" matter, when you have just moved to a new country, and are making new friends that are shaping what your life is going to be for the next year... and likely beyond that. These are the friends that we will laugh with, dine with, confide in, trust, that will trust you (hopefully), cook for (still working on that oven thing), ask advice of, and so much more.....

This is a slow process. You have to put yourself "out there" and take that risk ---- just like real dating. You might like someone that isn't really interested in being friends. Someone might dissappoint you. Or maybe you aren't as funny as you think you are. Or --- you might make a great friend that will be around for a long, long time. Wouldn't that be cool?

So far, Keith and I have been lucky. We've made some pretty fun and cool friends that we both enjoy. As long as we keep thinking that they think we are funny.....

Mary